Will I have it or not? What to choose...

Time to time it come to me...hunger for something particular... for instance my last illness is knitting. One day I just understood that it is winter! And what are we doing all long cold evenings... we knitting! Well, not all of us... but some people do. Why I'm still barehanded without half of the ugly sock proudly showing it to whole world? Something all the time counting and mumbling, quickly moving fingers... what can be more peaceful?

"No!" Said I to myself, I have tons of other projects to do ... But next day this thought come again and with sigh I decide to check what can I do, just something small to finish it and forget... I started to look at different designs of scarves and jackets and then even blankets and what do you think? Or course if at morning I was sure it will be new scarf, than at lunch I already wanted a white wool blanket which is 20 times more work...

It was so much of a progression in my wish, I counted it as not normal and that somehow it will be good to get sober and reevaluate it! Oh, nothing can make you sorry that you know how to sew, stitch or knit as much as shop with real prices for treads and other goods which you'll need to use... Good wool and in the required amount...may be faster and cheaper just to buy one? :) especially when I know I don't need this blanket. I just want to DO it, interested in process more than in result. So walking back and force there, calculating in my mind how much will cost me my white cloudy wish I decide to switch my mind to something else. If in few days I will not think of it as of wound of my heart, than it was nothing important. But if I will...sigh...I will be occupied till spring with my nice "little" hobby.

Why is it happen that little wish can grow in a whole blanket so fast and than blind by desire we ready to spent so much resources to reach goal, which will not change anything in our life, will not make our soul wise or heart kind. We have a lot of unnecessary things around which not make us happy even for a moment. Pleasure to buy will be forgotten under the bunch of other little and big boxes and packs. Joy of having it will last as long is it takes to put thing on shelve to forgot it and just rarely flip dust from it...

So, may be after all no blanket?...